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The Warriors' Guild

The Warriors of the Disc are a simple group of people. While other guilds on the Discworld bend cosmic forces of magic to their will, bother one of the many gods on the Disc, or even just be really sneaky bastards, all a warrior wants is a good weapon in hand, strength in their arm, and something funny to shout at people to make them soil their pants.

Warriors come in many shapes and sizes, however they tend to be larger, healthier folks, with a bit less intellegence than your average housepet. It is not entirely unknown for a warrior to be intelligent, however these fighters usually can't compare to their dumber siblings in contests of strength and speed.

Warriors come from every inhabited area on the Disc, and each guild has it's own style. Some guilds are soldiers that serve the country, while other are collections of mercenaries banded together. Some guilds even blur this line. Not all warriors live by the credo "one for all and all for one," but they each agree that they're better than all those other squishy little wusses around.

Warriors' Guilds

  • The Ankh-Morpork Palace Guard — Protectors of Ankh-Morpork and the Patrician (the ruler of Ankh-Morkpork), these men are usually thief takers who like respect, a snappy uniform, a pension, and a nice place to smoke out of the wind more than your average copper.
  • The Djelian Guard – The sworn guardians of Djelibeybi, which contains such marvelous things as sand, melons, sand, cats, sand belly-dancing girls ... did I mention sand? These guards are much like their Ankh-Morpork cousins but many seem to have a sunnier (or sandier) disposition. This is rumoured to be because of one of two things: it's sunnier there, (duh), or (and more likely) because of all the belly-dancing girls.
  • Duchess Saturday's Musketeers — Proudly wearing plumes in their hats and tights on their ass, these warriors may be known more for their abilities in the bedroom than on the battlefield, but this only reflects the Duchess Saturday's Musketeers intrests and not necessarily his abilities. Skilled in the art of seduction, these dashing Cassanudas are trained musically to better help them get into the bedroom of their target, and are trained in battle for when their target's spouse comes home early. Donpon, a completely unbiased Musketeer, has this to say about his fellows: "The other warriors like to poke fun at us, but let them. We're just as good at fighting as them and we get all the sex. I mean we get all the sex voluntarilly, instead of being forced to 'ravish' like some other warrior's I could name."
  • The Hublandish Barbarians — Dressed like a stripper with a leather fetish at the end of her act, these proud men and women truly define what it is to be a warrior. Sure they loot, pillage, plunder, and ravish just like anyone else, but an unoffical poll by the Guide on barbarism showed that no one has actually complained. Whether the victims are left alive to complain at all is another story.
  • The Imperial GuardThe Imperial Guard would have you believe that they are the perfect peace-keeping (read: asskicking) machine, and who could argue? These proud men and women were protecting the The Agatean Empire when the rest of the warriors around the world were bashing each other in the head with rocks. Not that that much has changed since. Also, they have plumes in their helmets, but they don't like to talk about it. Notably, they are the only people in The Agatean Empire that do not need weapon permits to bear arms. Imperial Guard Rondros says: "How about, simply the best? I think that suffices, I feel no need to advertise our superiority further."
  • The Lancre Highland Regiment — Morris Dancers, morris dancing. I think it has something to do with hankies and bells? I'm truly too scared to find out.
  • The Lancre Hunters — They're not afraid of anything except a bath, the indoors, and civilisation as a whole. This however leaves a great many things they are not afraid of, such as big, scary, hairy monsters with lots of pointy teeth. Also, if you ever need a parter in a Name That Tree From A Really Long Ways Away competition, the Lancre Hunters are your best bet. Holister, a member of this exclusive group, says: "We're the best guild for hugging tree's and sniping civilians."
  • The Samurai — These warriors truly put the art into the art of war. Trained in mind, body and calligraphy these skilled men and women hone their skills in everything from barehanded fighting to sword fighting, and from hair braiding to tea ceremonies. But what do you expect from people who live in Bes Perlargic?
  • The Weapon Masters' Court — Like the hunters, only not afraid to come indoors. Still afraid of baths, though. They may have taken their name to overcompensate for other "shortcomings" (wink wink nudge nudge).

Abilities

The Warriors have many of their primaries set in the fighting skill tree, as well as any alternative and otherwise fruity skills they specialise in. Their commands are based mainly in the fighting tree, but they can also learn others for healing and repairing.

Commands

bandage, bash, beat, behead, berserk, bob, chop, crush, feint, fix, guard, hack, iai, impale, judge, leatherwork, pierce, riposte, shove, slash, slice, smash, stab, track, trip, vurdere, warcry

Titles

Put guild titles the Warriors get in here, along with how to get them and/or what level you may use them at.

Other



Hitchhiker's Guide to Discworld